Don't Love The One Who Loves You

Assalamualaikum

 The Otai.

Okay-okay tajuk lebih sesuai rasanya kalau "Don't love someone just because he/she loves you". but nevermind. Lets get this thing straight to the point. Lets talk about cakap orang tua-tua yang ni. But lah kan, bila di fikir-fikir balik, dah agak lama aku tak tulis pasal love-love ni. Readers aku pun dah banyak yang tak tanya pasal love-love dah. Mungkin takut aku sound kot. Ah korang. Selagi korang comel, aku tak akan sound punyalah. Jangan risau. Oh, bila aku cakap 'comel', aku maksudkan perempuan sahaja yea. Lelaki, jangan nak mengada-ngada.

So, you guys believe on "Love the one who loves you. Not the one that you love."? Well, personally, i am not really into this quote. Quote ni biasanya di lemparkan kat seseorang yang dah reject korang, mungkin? Love the one who loves you, not the one that you love is really just like "bertepuk sebelah tangan"

Dalam banyak-banyak comment yang ada kat sini, ada beberapa comment yang aku amat-amat setuju.

Contohnya

"I don't get it, why would you want to force yourself to love someone that loves you (where you clearly don't have any feelings for that person)? That just makes you a selfish bastard. That person sebok dok nak make you happy, you on the other hand pulak, sebok TRYING to make yourself into liking/loving him. What happens if you just can't? Kan dah rugi masa/tenaga orang tu. Relationship is a mutual agreement." ~ I R Awesome

Here is the situation. You are a beautiful girl. An ugly guy came and confessed that he loves you like forever. And you must accept him just like that? Accept him and forget your so-long-Mr-Right that you are just wanna work it out? Just like that? Oh if yes, then you are a good liar.

 I am always a single boy, girl

Love, is the things that you can't force. It's damn no right if you are hoping you can. Pernah dengar tak pepatah "You are beautiful. But when he doesn't love you, then, he is not love you". Yes, its something like you are forcing someone to love you by using this quote but its not gonna be work.

You can force someone to 'be with' you. But you can't force them to be really love you. Believe me you are not going to be happy even you are 24/7 with the person that you love. Its all because he/she didn't feel the same way. And you gonna be look really pathetic. Pathetic.

Ianya sama bila korang couple hanya di sebab kan kasihan. Dan, seperti Ayie cakap, perempuan akan rasa annoying bila lelaki yang dia tak suka tak habis-habis mengurat. Well, seriously, lelaki pun akan rasa sama bila perempuan yang dia tak suka/ bukan taste dia asyik gangu dan cuba buat kita suka kat dia.

Satu lagi sebab aku rasa 'we-should-not-love-someone-just-because-he/she-loves-us' is 'the rhythm'

Aku bet la. You guys yang used to couple, break and flirts mesti dah perasan pasal the rhythm. Benda ni biasanya terjadi kat lelaki. Situasinya, seorang lelaki mengurat kaw-kaw perempuan tu. Kira macam best gila la main tarik tali. Sampai bertahun-tahun lelaki tu mengurat. Last-last, bila dapat, its nothing. Kenapa nothing? Ye la, masa sebelum couple, gila-gila perangai. Tapi bila dah couple, nak kena jaga perasaan lah, kena kongkong la, kena tu lah kena ni lah. Tu menyebabkan rhythm dah berubah (Aku belajar dalam Greek Season 3). Sebab tu la ramai complaint "Lelaki bila masa mengurat romantik je. Selepas dah dapat, terus rasa lain". Yes its all because you can't  follow the rhythm. Also, one of you can't get into another just like bertepuk sebelah tangan.

Your Prince Charming does not exist

Gadis A suka kat lelaki B. Lelaki B suka kat Gadis C. Gadis C suka kat lelaki D. Lelaki D pula suka kat Gadis A. Okay now tell me how the hack you gonna apply this "Love-the-one-that-loves-you.-Not-the-one-who-you-love" thing? Everybody needs to give up and live the love with the 'sympathize' feeling? With the person that he/she did not love?'


Actually, quote ni adalah terbaik di gunakan hanya untuk orang yang di kahwin paksa atau di kahwin dengan pilihan keluarga. Kalau tak faham, just baca novel Aa+Bb. Dan hal ni dah di cakap oleh Adziim juga dalam entri ni.

Aku percaya tetapi dalam situasi terus kahwin sahaja. Bina perasaan cinta itu semasa sudah bergelar suami isteri. Dalam kes kata orang tua ini, lebih ditekankan kepada pihak perempuan aku rasa. Kalau dalam konteks couple nasihat ini tak boleh pakai sangat, nak-nak kalau couple bertahun-tahun. Kerana love itu akan jadi jemu. Love dalam kahwin ini lain. ~ Adziim

Kan?

Korang nak ke seseorang yang korang suka, suka kat korang balik hanyalah sebab dia takut orang lain tak mampu sayangi dia (Based on the quote)? Dan lebih menyedihnya, korang nak ke seseorang tu 'pretending' sayang kat korang hanya semata-mata korang sayang kat dia?

Nobody is perfect.

Aku pernah baca satu buku motivasi tulisan HM Tuah kalau tak silap aku. Buku dia bagus. Walau pun tak sebagus penulis Jangan Bersedih, Mencari Makna Hidup dan Follow Your Heart, still, buku dia bagus. Dia ni selalu jadi Kaunselor Keluarga (agaknya). Katanya ada seorang isteri complaint sebab dia (si Isteri) tak boleh terima perangai Si Suami yang dia tak kenal (Kahwin pilihan keluarga). And HM Tuah ni suggestkan supaya si isteri belajar untuk sayang si suami. At the end, si isteri boleh terima si suami and live happy ever after. The End.

So, aku rasa memang quote ni lebih sesuai kalau di tujukan ke pasangan yang dah kahwin.

And, quote ni adalah better kalau ianya "LEARN to love someone who loves you".

But in the end, bila you guys still can't love the one who loves you even you tried it out, just drop off. Just stop and let he/she knows that you can't love him/her. And yes, 'that' one who loves you will suffer like hell after you dropped him/her off. Why? Because you gave him/her the false hope at the first place. You act like you 'like' him/her but the real is you don't. Its all because of this "love the one who loves you" quote.

So, thats why I didn't agree if this 'love the one who love you' concept is applied to couples.

"Love people who care for you than expecting love from someone who doesn’t care about you at all." - Geetha Anad

"Love the one who loves you." - Dr. Terri

"Jangan suka kat seseorang, hanya kerana dia suka kat korang." - Mr K

"Semua ni ujian. So pegi la blaja sayang yang maha ESA dulu..." - Cik Gincu 

Comment Cik Gincu tu mesti ramai terasa. Tapi aku tak. Aku tak.